Sadness

I’ve never known Sadness,

No, not even when I 

Was deep in love’s enchanting hallucination:

 The lure of the night,

Strange dances and strange men.

And awoke to find that I was all alone,

My beauty and childish innocence,

My pride and joy

Diminished-

Motherhood hastily 

Beckoning with each passing month.

No, that isn’t Sadness at all,

Not even when I had given myself

To the world, and received nothing

In return.Nothing-

Except for a babe’s hungry screams.

I looked upon her for the last time today,

Soft lips calmly sucking on my thumb

Her innocence so striking, her pristine beauty equally so;

But I did not will myself to shed a tear,

When those unfamiliar hands separated us 

Forever.

 Because mama knows no Sadness.

For ‘knowing’ implies that there was 

Once a time in mama’s life where 

She was truly happy.

No,

Mama knows no Sadness,

 Even as she polishes her face 

And paints her sensual lips,

Two fingers and cigarette smoke-

No,

Sadness knows mama.